Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
