I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
