he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I'm having to shit out rocks
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