I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize