i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
