New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
