Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
