I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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