Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
