question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
