Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
i need some magic done to my vagina
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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