At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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