I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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