Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize