What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Randomize