So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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