I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
