Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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