Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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