And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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