Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
actually, I'm a sock model
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize