I must be too annoying 4 u.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I party with great urgency now.
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