If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
