Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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