new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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