Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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