she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
