that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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