I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
