sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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