This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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