Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
