Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
