she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
