Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
The cops high fived after they tackled you
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
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