You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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