I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Randomize
