I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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