I'm jealous of your bromance
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
