he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
