I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
