i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
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