Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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