her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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