That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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