the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
