At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
