What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
