like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
