Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
