My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Randomize
